Tuesday 17 June 2014

Did they work?

Well not sure if it is the Epsom Salts, the writing things down or the fact that I have spent most of the last three weeks resting in bed but I feel different today. My head feels clear and although I still feel tired, I feel I may be able to push on. This is a good feeling. Three years ago, even a year ago I was unable to push on. I thought I had lost my life and was going to be bedridden for ever. My Doctor has been amazing. He has really been on this journey with me learning and listening to all the information I have found out. Looking up the Medication I have heard about that helps and once checked it out has prescribed it for me to see how I get on. I am not on huge amounts of Meds but what I do take I feel really helps me and don't think I am in a place to give them up like some people are doing. I only ever take the smallest amount possible because I react quite severely to them. Like when I was first given Codeine I just used to take half a tablet and this helped. I really don''t understand people who say they are on handfuls of Tablets but they don't do anything...... Well why take them then? I hate to discuss medication really because I think it becomes a "who takes the most" quest but it is something I need to touch on as it is a huge part of my life. 
The crowning moment was when I got prescribed Pregabalin. It is quite a funny story really as my Mum also suffers with symptoms a lot like mine and has also been diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. She got given Gabapentin and was having a really good time on them. Meaning she was up about and active. Feeling very well. So I went to my Doctor to tell him about these tablets and see if he thought I could try them......Well as some of you know one of the other symptoms of this illness is forgetfulness and what we call Brain Fog or Fibro fog. I get a lot of this and in particular this day I had it quite bad. My Mum had wrote the name of the Tablets down for me but I forgot to take it with me and what with all the information I had gathered from online, I couldn't remember what they were called. All I could remember was it was something like pregnant. So was saying it is  pre something. The tablets I was actually asking for was nothing like Pregnant!! they were called Gabapentin. So he looked up a tablet that sounded like pre something and came up with Pregabalin. He checked it was o.k for me to take them and prescribed them for me. Once I got in the car and checked my note. I was so disappointed with myself as I had the wrong Tablets. I went home and googled the ones I had and they were actually so similar to the ones I wanted it was uncanny. I thought about them for a few days before I took them but then decided to give them a go and well they are my life changers. They started working straight away. I felt quite high on just one Tablet but happy and so, so chatty it was quite funny and so lovely to feel like this. They soon settled down and I have been able to get out of Bed every day and get small things done each day. I am like a completely different person. At the beginning I was very anxious that I had this new life and it could be taken away so quickly if the Tablets stopped working but after a few Weeks I got used to being able to get up each day and the anxiety wore off. It wasn't a normal life still but such a difference. I was actually able to get things done. I even managed to finish tiling the Kitchen Wall!!
That is one really sad thing about this illness. I told my Specialist the other day about tiling the Wall and he was speechless, I think because I knew how to do it rather than the fatigue thing!! I was always so able to do things. I could do anything that was needed or I would give it a bloody good try before I asked anyone to help me and now I have become ill. Sometimes I cant even get in the bath.... It is just so sad and when at my lowest this is where I go.... to remembering how able I was. How can you not get sad and depressed? Tears are coming now just writing this and I can never see this feeling going. How can you get over that?? 
Anyway getting on to a  brighter note;
Small Rainbow Tuxedo Bow's for Isabella.
A bow for every outfit :-)

Larger Twisted boutique Bow for my Friends Grandaughter's
Birthday

Larger Twisted Boutique bow. Needs more practice
but very happy with results. Took me all day to get it looking like this and hours watching the same youtube video over and over again but I love learning new things,

 I have been making bow's since my Granddaughter arrived and been practicing on bigger ones lately for when she get's older and also for a Friends Granddaughters. It is something I can do whilst resting. For a while I thought I would never get back into Crafting but now..... thankfully I am back and really enjoying it when I feel well enough. I am trying to do more resting activities. Learning to rest a lot if I have to do something physical. So I am learning at last but it is so hard as if I am having a good day all I want to get everything done whilst I can. 
So just to introduce you to my Facebook Craft page if you are into that sort of thing. It is here; Wendy's Crafts  I mainly make for friends and family but trying to make it look professional enough to sell if someone ever wanted to buy my items and to also look into making a bit of money with minimum energy :-)

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